Top 5 reasons why you are feeling stuck and not achieving your goals + How to battle them
"You are confined only by the walls you build yourself."
So often in life, we know that we want to do this certain thing or achieve this certain goal or work on xyz, but either we are not hitting those goals or not working towards them like we need to.
And before I hit you you with these things, I'd just like to soften the blow by saying that your eyes are really beautiful;)*
[*The Big Bang Theory Reference]
Here are some of the reasons you are not achieving your goals and how to battle them:
1. Lack of Planning
What this looks like:
You have a big goal that you want to work towards, but you are so overwhelmed by the entirety of it that you end up either doing nothing or you end up working, but nothing needle moving is achieved in that work that you have put in.
This happens when you have not planned or scheduled or time blocked whatever it is that you know that you need to do. It is because you haven't broken it down into tangible steps yet.
This is massively heartbreaking because not moving forward due to overwhelm or worse, putting in the work, but not getting results due to the lack of proper planning are both situations that we can control and problems we can deal with and solve.
Now that you have identified that this is what needs to change; sit down, right now and write down the big goal. I want you to write the 6-month or 3-month goal and break it down into tangible steps that you can start doing one at a time. Make that timeline, time-block it in your calendar and make sure you stick to what you have decided.
2. Excess of planning and Action paralysis:
What it looks like:
This is the other end of the spectrum of planning and this is where, as the heading already tells you, you plan and plan and plan and tweak the plan and you move around dates and actions and timelines, but you do not take any actual action.
Hence, action paralysis. I love this one so much because I passionately believe in taking messy action and it's something that I am always working on.
So, if you are an over-planner and never-doer, here's the solution.
Trust me guys - "Done is better than Perfect."
If you belong to this category, you probably have a pretty good idea about what you need to do. If not, then go back to solution number 1.
But once you have a plan in place, what you need to do is write down the deadline. Write it down; date, time and all. You need to treat this deadline as the finish line. No matter what little tweaks still need to be made, you need to get it out into the world or decide that it's done.
Because one thing that I absolutely believe in is - "Done is better than Perfect."
Now, this is a whole thing. The first two problems listed could also very well lead you to procrastinate. But like I said, it's a whole other thing with many other causes as well.
What it looks like:
It's watching that TV show for hours on end or re-reading that book and feeling guilty as every single minute goes by because you know you should be doing something else.
The reason that this is a terrible situation to be in is because you are literally killing time. You are not working and you are not even enjoying. And as someone who has been in that situation so so so very often, I can tell you, it sucks.
Go to the root of the matter here. Find out why you are procrastinating and deal with it. Find out whether it's a mindset thing like some kind of fear (like the fear of being judged or fear of failure) or if it's perfectionism or if it's your lack of interest in the activity as a whole. There is so much to cover in this topic alone.
I have written an entire post on action steps to beat procrastination, I'm sure it'll be very helpful to you. You can check it out here.
Once you have dealt with this problem, act! I have a Simple 10 step process to get rid of procrastination linked here.
Use these steps and act!!!
4. Waiting for the perfect time/ situation
Let me get this out there at the very beginning: There's not going to be a perfect time or situation and that's a rule. Waiting for that is just going to hold you back and it's honestly not worth it.
What it looks like:
I used to do this since I was in school, where I would be saying, "I only have half an hour right now. Let me just do this other thing. I'll study when I have a proper hour or two in hand."
Then it became, "I want to start a blog and I'm just going to wait for the perfect social situation or qualification to start it."
But guess what, I learnt that the half an hour stretched of quick study sessions were highly effective and here I am writing to you right now.
Knowing that there is never going to be a perfect situation or time ever. Its always going to be messy and its always going to be chaotic and it's still going to be absolutely amazing the moment that you decide to take that action.
Just know this and keep repeating this to yourself and you are golden!
There's never going to be a perfect time or situation and that's a rule. Waiting for it is just going to hold you back and it's honestly not worth it.
5. Quantity over quality:
What it looks like:
This one I feel makes a lot of sense in terms of study goals, but also works really well for other stuff as well.
So many people make the mistake of staring at books for hours and hours together and the quality of concentration or work is not that great during all that time and so the end product is average. Hence, Input > Output.
For non-study related goals, this shows up as working for hours and hours, but not recognising and working on the truly needle-moving things. Those high yield things that you know will move you forward that day.
This is a very skewed equation and is a frustrating point to be stuck.
Ask yourself the hard questions, recognize the things that you need to do that are high yield. And work really hard if that's what you need to do, but also ask yourself how you can support yourself around those goals.
Recognize when you are unable to do your best work. Ask yourself the question of how you can support yourself. Use journaling, use meditation, use a walk. Even use your mirror to talk to yourself if that's your style! But, recognize, ask and support!
Ask yourself the hard questions, recognize the things that you need to do that are high yield and work really hard if that's what you need to do, but also ask yourself how you can support yourself around your goals.
So, these were a few things that were maybe stopping you from reaching your goals and keeping you stuck and the solutions to all these obstacles.
If you feel like there is any other reason that holds true for you, I would love to know about it so I can help support you around it.
Let me know if this helped you, if you used it and it worked or if you have any other question, connect with me on email or Instagram.
I love to hear from you guys!