The Questions You really need to be Asking Yourself!
You know how sometimes something you see or hear sparks something in you and you feel like you've got to share it. That's how this entire thing is coming to you guys.
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In this episode, we talk about the two questions that you really need to be asking yourself every.single.day and then, there's a short, sweet and eye-opening exercise for you that you'll love! We chat about:
Being a better decision-maker in the everyday micro-decisions
Why it's so important to reframe your thoughts
Where is the grass really greener?
When and How to learn to reframe
How to begin when you don't really believe in the idea
How you can take full responsibility now and make the changes you need
THE TWO QUESTIONS
I heard Lori and Chris talk about this thing in an episode of the Earn Your Happy Podcast a few weeks ago and it sparked something in me and I shared it with my best friend, my family and they all loved it as well. So I realised that I've got to share this thing because it crosses of all the 'Preya' criteria: It's simple, easily + consistently implementable and very effective!
[This was a B99 reference, in case that part wasn't clear;)]
So, the Questions are...Drumroll please:
1. How would I feel about this an hour from now?
2. And how can I look at this differently?
Let's dive deep into them now.
INSTANT GRATIFICATION is throwing you off!
We, so often, take decisions based on how we feel NOW, instead of how whatever we do is going to make us feel in the very near future and that leads us to make decisions that give us instant gratification, which is something that our primitive brain is fighting for all the time.
But, there's really no progress if we don't get out of our comfort zone.
So, in the everyday micro-decisions that we make, if we stopped for a moment and actually asked ourselves aloud...'How would this make me feel an hour from now and be honest with our answer, we would end up making much better decisions!
REFRAMING is where it's at!
The question for reframing comes up in two kinds of situations:
1. In consequences of everyday decisions
We ponder about the decisions that we have already made and get in the loop of how things might've been different if we had chosen differently.
And we do this because it's human nature:
The grass is always greener on the other side, right?.
Wrong.
Here's an altered version of the same that really resonated with me and it makes perfect sense in this context...it goes like this:
“The grass is greener where you water it!”
Thats good, right?
Reframing is not about pretending that the things that are not good are good, ok?
So, it's is not about pretending...its about re-caliberating...like google maps!
Reframing is not about pretending...its about re-caliberating.
2. In everyday problems
When we come up against a problem, we need to do the same...so we need to ask ourselves...How can i look at this differently?
What this does is, instead of placing us in the victim postion or the passenger seat, it places us on the driver seat...which means we can actually control how we respond and how we think about this.
It forces us to think beyond our normal confines of, “This is a problem and I'm stuck...ahhhhh”
LET'S WORK THIS OUT TOGETHER!
Create a nice calm ambience with candles and get your favourite drink and journal and pen and let's begin:
Close your eyes for just a moment... Now take a nice deep breath and being writing the answers to these questions:
1. What is the one thing right now that I know I need to reframe my thoughts around?
2. How can I look at this differently?
Or
How is this happening for me? Not to me...but How is it happening for me
3. How can I take full responsibility here?
The answers may or may not have come up for you immediately, you might have needed to come back to them once again, with a fresh mind or you might have to think really out of the box, and thats ok.
So, now, you have your initial thought, you have the reframed version of it and you also have action steps to get through...and the best part is...you came up with these yourself!
MORE FROM THIS EPISODE:
What does it look like to reframe in real life or in your current situation?
Don't understand how reframing works? I got you back.
I don't believe in faking or forcing thoughts or feelings either.
We dig into all these topics with tangible and implementable tips in this episode.
So, tune in for, a relatable story, possibly an "Aha" moment (a girl can hope!) and some very tangible tips, steps and questions you can follow through that will transform the way you think!
And as always..
Give me a tag in your stories or share it with someone who you think would love this or needs this.
The exercise in the first and second episodes; so many of you shared with me how you felt, what you thought and what came up for you and it really made my day!
It makes me so happy to see who’s listening and to see if it made a difference!